There should be a parallel between our supplications and our thanksgivings. We ought not to leap in prayer, and limp in praise.
Today has been a rough day. My symptoms have been flaring and I have found it difficult to keep moving and be productive. Fatigue and lack of focus are making it rough to think and to write let alone maintain a healthy attitude. That’s often the case for those of us struggling with illness. Whether it’s dealing with our infirmities in general or the various symptoms that present themselves, days are regularly difficult and require much effort to endure. Many trials offer similar effects. It may be grief, caring for a dying loved one, attempting to redirect a rebellious child or any of the other life traumas that completely overwhelm us, but whatever “it” is, we are easily shut down and find it difficult to manage the affairs of the day let alone be industrious or thrive.
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With what little time we have left for making life meaningful, too many of us find ourselves going through the motions and achieving very little of lasting value. We live as if we have all the time in the world, when the truth of the matter is that our time on earth is short. We truly are ‘here today, gone tomorrow,’ making every second precious.
This year has been as season of challenges and unplanned events. While on vacation in July, my wife broke her ankle which led to surgery and several weeks of not bearing weight on her left leg. Needless to say, it has caused challenges of various sorts for both of us. Additionally, we’ve just returned for a trip that was to be a relaxing time at the beach. Given the recent surgery, we considered canceling; however, as the trip included our aunt and uncle, we chose to proceed as planned desiring to take advantage of every opportunity that we have to spend time with them. What was not planned was a hurricane Irma heading straight toward our chosen location.
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Days after my nineteenth birthday, I was in a car accident with seven college friends. As we drove from the choir concert that we had just finished to a friend’s house so that we could sing at his church the following morning, a drunk driver pulled out in front of us causing us to hit head on. The van we were riding in hit, spun, tipped on its side and slid down the road. In the process of tipping, my face fell into the cutout that would be used if a window had been installed. Since there was none, only the outer layer of the van door stood between my face and the road. As we slid, it was as if God gave me a glimpse into heaven and asked if I would prefer to come home to him or remain in my current life.
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When I’m up to it and the weather is nice, I like to ride my bike to the gym. Today was one of those days. I didn’t expect it to be warm enough, but the sun was shining which made the air pleasant. I had dressed for cooler weather, so I became a little warm as I rode. While at the gym, I was concerned that I might get too warm on the way home. However, while I was there, a heavy cloud cover rolled in and the ride home was actually a little cooler than I like. What a difference a little sunshine can make and what a difference various forms of light make in our lives.
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My wife and I are currently on vacation staying in a seaside condo. We determined a few years ago that we are “beach people”. We like to see and visit other places, but our first love is a seaside beach. Marie grew up by the ocean in New England. I was inland; consequently, my only encounter with the ocean was an overnight stay in Daytona while on a college choir tour. She was excited to get me to the ocean and once there I was hooked. At dinner last night we were talking about that fact. As we talked while eating seaside, Marie observed that it is quite possible that I love the ocean more than she does. I agreed stating that trips to the ocean are as much or more about my soul than rest and relaxation.
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I love our church body, our pastors and staff. There is a genuine desire to faithfully teach the word of God and to encourage godly living. That said, I do find holiday services to be a bit frustrating. As a Christian, I come to church to meet God through worship and instruction and feel short changed when a significant portion of the service is spent on special numbers by the choir, solos, and dramatic performances. I prefer to interact with God rather be entertained. This past Sunday I was really struggling with this as we celebrated Easter. Thankfully, God did not allow me to wallow long before He started to convict me to look at the broader picture.
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Ever since I was a child, I have hated conflict of any kind. Even though I know that it is not real, conflict in a movie or TV drama can cause me to pace or stress eat. Even a useful debate causes stress. That does not mean that I do not engage when I perceive the need, but even when I am firm in my conviction, I do not enjoy the process. However, there are two conflicts in which I engage on a daily basis. The first battlefield is my health. While I do my best to appease my health issues and mitigate my symptoms, there are times when they interfere with my life on some level or severely hamper my ability to function for a period of time. When I find I can’t win the battle, I am forced to retreat and let the symptoms run their course allowing Christ’s grace to be sufficient. As godly as that may sound it’s not easily achieved because the other war that I’m fighting is my nature to sin.
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