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Altered Plans – Accepting Change

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The mind of man plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.  Proverbs 16:9

As reflected in the passage above, we often make plans only to have them changed or redirected.  Such is the case today.  I have two posts partially written but I’m not up to the task of creating.  The weather has turned and my body is reacting.  Further recent events in our life have me distracted and unsettled which also affects me physically.  As frustrating as it is, it is a common dilemma in my life.  In an attempt to be more in tune with my physical limitations and not exacerbate the situation, I have decided to reuse a post from two years ago.  It’s not my first choice, but it is the prudent one and a nuance of accepting the realities of my life with some measure of grace.  Change is inevitable and as I contemplate the changes that God has made to various plans throughout my life and the lives of those I love, four reasons that come to mind are: redirection, placement, refinement, and grace.

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Dreaded News

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How blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in His commandments. He will not fear evil tidings; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord.   Psalm 112:1,7

In the spring of 1996 my wife and I left around 7 a.m. to take our older daughter to play in a soccer tournament.  As we began to walk onto the fields searching for Adrienne’s team, I noticed people pointing at us and a police officer walking towards us.  I knew that we were about to receive bad news and dread began to fill my soul.  My fears centered around our younger daughter who was not with us and my mother who had been ill.  I could not bear the thought of anything happening to either of them.  The police officer informed us that my mother had passed away around the time that we left our home and that my father had contacted them to inform us.  In that moment my strength left and I dropped to my knees filled with both grief and relief.  I grieved my mother’s passing and was greatly relieved that Christine was ok.  Since that day, I have learned much about dreaded news through experience and the faith of fellow servants of our Lord. 

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Barriers

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From whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.  Ephesians 4:16 

Our new neighborhood has sidewalks on the back side of each property creating nice series of paths.  As I was walking our dog the other day, I noticed the variety of back yards.  Most have either no fence or chain link fencing while a few have privacy fences.  As Marie and I considered what to do about our own which needs some work, we have agreed that we prefer the chain link as it keeps our yard open to meeting and greeting our neighbors.  This discussion caused me to consider not only our yard but our life style and personalities.  In other words, do we live our lives in ways that invite others in or do we put up barriers?  While it’s very easy to do for a variety of reasons, Christ desires that we love well living in community rather than in isolation.

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The Waiting Game

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Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord. Psalm 27:14

This spring I was finally diagnosed after a 27 year wait.  A fresh perspective, advances in technology, and a better understanding of the human body have come together provide the relevant information for a conclusive finding.  During that time there was much angst, frustration, concern and of course much prayer on our behalf.  I regularly went to the Lord throughout that time, however, the tone and nature of my prayers changed as God used my poor health to mature my perspective.  At first I prayed that God would relieve my pain.  After some time, I began to ask for His grace to endure this illness.  Having given up my career and studying the matter in earnest, I began to request that God would instruct me.  I have now come to the point that I beseech our Father in Heaven to use my trials to allow me to be a minister of His mercy to others.    While I make no claims to being the best student or a perfect model of godliness, I am grateful that God has matured my faith and has kept me looking to Him for solace and direction.  To be sure waiting on God can be difficult.  Scripture is full of examples of those that tried to hurry things along rather than wait on God.  Yet, in order to patiently and graciously wait on God we must keep in mind that He will hear us, He is our hope, and He will be good to us.

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Taking a Break

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Over the past few months, I have been struggling to manage everything going on in my life. You may have notice that the weekly quotes, verse of the day etc. have been discontinued the past few months. I have been trying to keep up the blog, but this week I have come to the decision that I need to take a couple of weeks off. As we are moving next week our home needs to be packed up and we will have to sort things out in our new home. God has blessed us greatly in this transition. However, I have not done a good job pacing myself so I ask for your understanding. Lord willing, I plan to resume the blog the first week in October.

Blessings

Will

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Training Our Children

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It’s been a hectic week so I’ve dusted off and tweaked an older post on a topic that is dear to me…especially as a grandfather.

Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.  Proverbs 22:6

Both of my grandfathers were excellent carpenters.  My paternal grandfather made furniture with his brother-in-law while my maternal grandfather made several pieces for our family.  But their skills were not limited to furniture.  Similarly, my father was and my uncle is skilled in carpentry, masonry, electrical work, etc.  Having grown up on a farm, their skills needed to have a broad spectrum.  Sadly, neither my brothers nor I are particularly well trained in those areas.  Certainly, we can all swing a hammer or use a screwdriver, but the level of expertise is greatly diminished.  We grew up in a different era and circumstance which did not make those talents as necessary.  Consequently, our father didn’t feel the same need to train us as his father did.  As a result, the knowledge did not get passed from one generation to the other.   Living with chronic illness requires a special skill set, especially in the spiritual and psychological areas.  It is our trust in God that allows us to live well and the lack of it which causes us to falter.   Whether or not we have children of our own, there will be children (whether infants or grown adults)  in our sphere of influence that we will impact positively or negatively depending on how we face our illness and/or the trials that arise during the course of our lives.

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Protecting What Matters Most

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Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life.  Proverbs 4:23

This week we began the process of packing up our house.  I started with a hutch that we are planning to sell.  It took all day as I was vigilant to wrap things carefully…especially the important items.  Nothing we have is worth much.  However, many of the items have significant sentimental value.  Some are gifts while others are dishes that my parents used which evoke emotional responses as well as fond memories.  As I carefully packed each item and placed the most treasured items in boxes that we will personally handle, I was challenged with the thought that I might possibly be putting more energy into protecting mere household goods than I do in protecting my mind, my soul, and the gospel.  That experience has had me pondering this topic all week and challenged my thoughts and behaviors.

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Faces of Change

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Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. James 1:17

It’s often said that the only constant in life is change.  That has been true for us this summer.  Within our family: we have sold or are selling four homes, buying three, two families have moved, Marie and I are in the process, our three grandsons have changed schools, Adrienne and Tom just got married, and Adrienne has gone from single woman to wife and mother.  I’m sure there are more changes, but that’s about all my mind can process at the moment.  Most of these changes are intentional.  The boys, however, had no say in the matter, but seem to be adapting reasonably well.  As reflected in our family’s situations this summer, some change is chosen and some is not.  No matter whether we choose change or whether it is thrust upon us without our consent, there are usually benefits that are enjoyed and challenges that cause frustration.  It is incumbent upon us to recognize that both are God’s will for us and must be received graciously and thankfully.

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Graceful Perseverance

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His master said to him, “Well done, good and faithful slave. You were faithful with a few things, I will put you in charge of many things; enter into the joy of your master.”  Matthew 25:23

This past weekend, my daughter and I performed the father daughter dance at her wedding reception.  It was not flawless, but it was fun and was, by the accounts of others, beautiful and well done.  However, those three minutes and thirty-one seconds of dancing were the end result of hours of instruction and practice.  Throughout the last few months there was a fair amount of perseverance for both of us.  My daughter was juggling work, moving, wedding planning, dance lessons with her husband, and at the end a sinus infection in addition to lessons with me.  For my part, the normal responsibilities of life, the extra activity necessary for the wedding preparations as well as getting our home ready for company and the frequent dance lessons caused by body to get too run down.  On one occasion my wife and our dance instructor ended a dance lesson shortly after we began because I was too fatigued to function well.  The Monday and Tuesday prior to the wedding, I was also struggling to do anything of value.  In short, the celebratory dance that was enjoyed was culmination of a fair amount of graceful perseverance.  It was a series of choices to take risks and rise above adversity to live well.  It was choosing perseverance.

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Dancing With the Father is a Matter of Trust

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Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.  Proverbs 3:5-6

As we make final preparations for our daughter Adrienne’s wedding this weekend, one of my main concerns is the father daughter dance.  As much as I love to dance, I prefer to avoid the spotlight as I struggle to remember all of the steps and provide the proper leads while also trying to maintain the proper form.  It is not just a matter of looking good, but also, in some cases, a matter of personal safety.  The picture above is of Christine and me at her wedding nine years ago.  By the grace of God, Marie and I have had the privilege of parenting our two daughters who have grown into lovely women.  As such, these two dances signify transition in that my role as their father takes a back seat to their new life with their respective husbands.  That said, as their father, they still trust that they can come to me with anything knowing that I will do my best to help them.  In that regard they place much trust in me.  However, as much as I desire to help them, I cannot provide the assurance that their Heavenly Father can. Most of what follows has been published before but is a favorite of mine and has much to do with the title of this blog site.

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