Let your heart
therefore be wholly devoted to the LORD our God, to walk in His statutes and to
keep His commandments, as at this day. 1
Kings 8:61
Roughly twenty years ago, I was in the hospital for
observation to see if they could determine why I was having seizures. It was a one week stay in a unit that had
four rooms with glass fronts; each patient was hooked to 80 electrodes and
under both physical and video observation all of the time. The situation created an environment that lent
itself to intimacy. In order to provoke
seizures, the first tactic was to discontinue seizure meds. This was a concern to one young man in the
room directly across from mine. He had
not been married long and with the help of his medication, his wife had never
seen him have a seizure. He had several
violent ones that week, however, she showed up every day to visit and help him
as best she could. In contrast, the man
in the room next to him came to my room one night upset. He was a successful businessman who, from his
own account, had an active and fun life with lots of assets and parties. As his seizures threatened his ability to
work and therefore, his lifestyle, his wife had decided to leave him. She told him that it wasn’t what she “signed
up for” and had no intention of being his nurse. These are the two sides of commitment.
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Love is patient, love
is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not
act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into
account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with
the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all
things. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
For us, this
is wedding month. Lord willing, on
August 17th our older daughter Adrienne will wed her fiancé
Tom. That leaves us in a whirlwind of
finalizing arrangements, finishing decorations, polishing dance steps and of
course making the final payments for everything. It’s a busy time with the expectation of a
joyous celebration which makes the effort worthwhile. In that light, my plan for the next few posts
is to focus on topics related to marriage and weddings. However, I will do my best to applicable
whether one is single or married. That
said, this first post of the series takes a look at love.
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Yet for us there is but
one God, the Father, from whom are all things and we exist for Him; and one
Lord, Jesus Christ, by whom are all things, and we exist through Him. 1 Corinthians 8:6
Yesterday was another rough day. I had a dentist appointment, met with my trainer briefly and went to the doctor. Prior to illness taking over my life, working these in around my job and responsibilities at home would have been nothing exceptional. They were minor adjustments to my normal routine. However, yesterday, they wiped me out and left me pretty useless. Some days, the thought of getting out of bed and simple routine tasks such as taking a shower can be daunting and insurmountable. While chronic illness seems to bring with it a regular cycle of pain and fatigue leaving one feeling alone, defeated, and useless, other trials in life like the death of a loved one or a job loss can do the same until they are resolved or the critical stage has passed. In an effort to combat those feelings consider the following passages about God and His perspective.
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Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10
A few weeks ago, I took my wife’s car in for service. While working on it, they found that three of
the light bulbs were out and asked if I wanted them to replace them. After a brief discussion, I decided to try to
save some money and do it myself. While
simple enough for many, it was not that for me.
As is the case with many of us with chronic illness, I had to mentally
gear up for something new, get the parts and then have the energy to attack the
project. Knowing my limitations, I
searched for and reviewed a few “how to” videos. The light bulb over the license plate didn’t
go quite as instructed or planned but I managed to get it replaced after a fair
amount of effort. However, the rear side
marker lights didn’t fare so well. There
were two clips holding the trunk liner in place that I could not get out. Thankfully, the next day our son-in-law Corey
figured it out and showed me the error of my ways allowing me to complete the
task. Without his counsel, I was failing,
but with his counsel I succeeded. In
this case, the situation was rather benign; however, often times counsel is
needed in more difficult circumstances.
If we are to be a helpful and encouraging companion, we need to be
discerning in our approach to counsel.
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See how great a love
the Father has bestowed on us, that we would be called children of God; and
such we are. For this reason the world does not know us, because it did not
know Him. 1 John 3:1
As the father of two, I have a greater understanding of God’s
love for us than prior to parenthood. My
wife and I have very different personalities and our daughters have followed
suit. In most ways our older daughter’s
personality is more like mine while our younger daughter’s is more like her
mother’s. My relationship with my daughters is equally
different. Adrienne and I think alike,
understand each other more readily and both enjoy music and dancing. Christine and I have to work harder to
understand each other, but make the effort.
I’m not sure either of us enjoys painting our homes, but we enjoy doing
it together and make a great team. We
also share a love of gardening…allowing us to go to a plant store together is
financially risky. I love and am truly
grateful for both of our daughters and could not imagine my life without either
of them. The same is true of our Heavenly
Father’s relationship with each of us.
We each have different personalities, talents and character flaws. We are at different places in our lives as
well as at different places in our faith and spiritual maturity. Further, our Father has different plans for
us. As a result, we have different needs;
therefore, His provisions for us and the life experiences that He has ordained
for us will be as varied as the structure of snowflakes…no two are alike. As a
result, his children often struggle to understand His love for them.
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Sing praise to the
Lord, you His godly ones, and give thanks to His holy name. Psalm 30:4
Life with an
invisible illness can be tricky. There
are limitations which others cannot see that become frustrating. They are vexing because one cannot do the
things that they used to do or would like to do. They may be annoying to others as they expect
more than the illness allows one to deliver.
It’s a balance to be maintained as well as managing the illness
itself. But then, all trials present
limitations and hurdles that must be managed or overcome. In the fray, it’s easy to lose sight of the
blessings of life and to be thankful for them.
This holiday week, my illness has been pushed to the background to focus
on better things as I truly have a thankful heart.
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You will make known to
me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy; in Your right hand
there are pleasures forever. Psalm 16:11
As a rule, being lost causes a fair amount of
frustration. Marie and I visited Red
Rock Canyon this week. During our
excursion we attempted to see pictographs on some of the rocks. Sadly that didn’t happen. The scenic drive
through the canyon is a 13 mile one way road and there was a right turn onto a
short two way road that we missed. Since
we had time, we decided to circle around again.
On our second attempt, we successfully made the turn and found the
parking area. However, our lack of
familiarity with the paths and the absence of a good trail map left us lost and
wandering on steep and rocky paths. Out
of time and lacking good directions, we gave up our search and returned to our
car defeated. For His children, God
offers a path to peace. Sadly, we often
fail to experience the fullness of tranquility, joy and pleasure that our
Savior desires for us because we lose our way.
Similar to our excursion to Red Rock Canyon, it’s common for Christians
to get lost on the path to peace because of ignorance, distraction or
rejection.
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The Christian needs to walk in peace, so no matter what happens they will be able to bear witness to a watching world.
Henry Blackaby
Christian Quotes
But he who listens to
me shall live securely and will be at ease from the dread of evil. Proverbs 1:33
Reassurance
is the act of removing doubts and fears.
Most people like reassurances. It
comes in many forms. At times it’s the
emotional reassurance of having a close relative or friend who walks with us in
difficult times. It may be a legal
document that spells out our rights or claims to anyone who needs to know. Another example is a simple receipt that we
hang on to as proof of sale. All of
these and many more offer some form of comfort that allow us to live, work,
own, or exchange without fear of being harmed or cheated. However, when it comes to true reassurance,
we look to our Sovereign Lord who is the ultimate authority in all matters of
faith and life.
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He who neglects
discipline despises himself, but he who listens to reproof acquires
understanding. Proverbs
15:32
During my recent
drive to New England and back, I was rounding a curve in the road using the
passing lane. A semi in the right lane
put on their turn signal and proceeded to cut me off. I was a bit irritated until a few moments
later I saw that there was another vehicle in the breakdown lane. The curve in the road blocked our view until
the last moment. The vision of the car
seemed to be God’s way of adjusting my attitude about the driving of others. Granted, I was a bit road weary and tired of
being cut off by vehicles significantly exceeding the average speed of
traffic. However, in this case, I had
made assumptions with limited information and errantly responded accordingly.
Discipline, rebuke, correction, constructive criticism, punishment, etc. are words that usually make us uncomfortable because the remind us of our fallibility and sinful nature. Another challenge is that the person seeking to change our behavior is also fallible. Consequently, the nature of our relationship usually determines how well we listen and whether or not we modify our conduct. How we respond will also have an impact on that relationship. The same is true of our bond with our Heavenly Father. When He chooses to discipline us, we need to refrain from judgments about His goodness and love that undermine our relationship as we have very limited information. Rather we ought to accept His guidance gladly by focusing on His motivation, goal and character.
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